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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Greg
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Post Posted: Thu Aug 04, 2005 6:09 am
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Tales of Happy Valley
Chapter 93: Monica's Dilemma


"I don't suppose you're referring to the fact that I won that election?" Greg said.

Shirley shook her head, slowly. "Um... no."

"Hoo boy!" Oh no! Not again!

"So, let's have lunch!" She said.


Single Mom, Again!

By the time lunch was ready, Shirley had lapsed into a petulant mood. "Darn," she said. "It's a shame you're already taken. I don't want to be a single mom again!"

"Is that what you really want?" She said. "A husband?"

Shirley looked at Her and thought about it. "Well, I don't want to be a single mom. Been there. Done that. Love the kids, but otherwise didn't like it. But, no. I don't want a husband. I want a career!"

"The two are not mutually exclusive," She said.

"Some gals are cut out for married life," Shirley said. "And some aren't. I think I'm in the latter group. I really do love my kids. I think I like having babies! But I'm not looking forward to raising another one. Especially not alone. And I don't want to get married!"



As always, She has a solution.

"That's no problem," She said. "I love raising babies! I'll take care of your child! We have plenty of room! Um, don't we, sweetie?"

"Of course!" Greg said. "And don't worry about money. I'll cover all expenses, all the way through college!"

Shirley looked at She, incredulous. "Darn! Where were you two when I had Graham and Shirley? But you can't be serious! You'd raise another woman's baby?"

"Been there! Done that! More than once! Loved every minute of it!"

"You have?"

"Oh my! You were stuck in that Maxian time warp for a long time, Monica! We'll have to get together for a serious gossip session! And soon!"

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Greg
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Location: Happy Valley
Post Posted: Thu Aug 04, 2005 6:48 am
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Tales of Happy Valley
Chapter 94: Monica Comes Out


"Oops!" Monica said. "Excuse me for just a minute! I think--"


No more opportunies for denial here!
This really did happen right in the middle of that same lunchtime conversation.

"Well, it's not exactly the height of fashion, but it will do! And now I'm really hungry!"



Monica accepts her fate

"Keep those hamburgers coming! I wonder if I have any more pickles?"

"You'll have to try Ophelia's pickles!" She said. "She even raises the cucumbers herself!"

"Oh! How's Ophelia doing?"

"Just like you and me! Kids are in college. She's pregnant again."

"You too?"

"Me, always! I plan to keep having babies until I've run the whole alphabet!"

"Oh dear! With your own children, you don't want--"

"Yes I do. Now stop arguing and eat! Animal protein, every day. At least milk. Borrow a cow from Ophelia if you have to! And if you don't like cows' milk, I'll come over and feed you myself as soon as my next one is born! I'm serious! It's vital for the baby's proper brain development! Promise me!"

"No issues there, She. I'm an omnivore. But that part about you coming over--"

"I was kidding. But I was serious, too. If that's what it would take to get the right amino acids into you, I'd do it! Your baby will not be denied!"

Monica grinned. "I'm tempted to hold you to that just to see if you'd really do it!"

"Just give me a call and you'll find out!" She said. "But read the warning on the label. You'll get fat on my stuff. It's 37% richer than cows' milk."



Greg reveals The Secret

Greg chuckled. "Where do you think Smart Milk comes from?"

"Now I know you're kidding!"

"Nope!" She said.

"Is this a blonde thing?"

"No, it's a Captain Hero thing."

"You're Captain Hero?"

"Yup! That's no secret. I told you that you were behind on the local gossip! But I'm on extended maternity leave right now. Call it a sabbatical."


Last edited by Greg on Sat Aug 13, 2005 12:52 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Liss
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Location: Pocatello, Idaho
Post Posted: Thu Aug 04, 2005 3:30 pm
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I started a new neighborhood, and on Pescado's advice, deleted all townies. I did generate a few of my own, without the wierd names, with a mod I found somewhere that generates better names. I have Pescado's mod that keeps townies and dormies from regenerating. So I have very few of each. So far I have 3 founding families, including Sheba and her toddler daughter, Shaunda. I thought she would like it if I started her with at least one child so she wouldn't pine for more while she is waiting around for a mate. I'm going to start one more family to mix the genes a bit. I'm hoping this is enough to get a 'hood started without mucking up the bloodlines too much. Of course, I'll be utilizing the townies I did generate to marry them off to.

Shaunda, by the way, is a Sheba clone, but I started her off with black hair. Should be interesting to see how she grows up!

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Greg
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Post Posted: Thu Aug 04, 2005 3:57 pm
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Talk about great--or perhaps deviant--minds! I was wondering if it were possible to revert a clone to a different age, so I, too, created a family based on that idea.

Of course, I got totally carried away with it. Hence, the Bennetts of Taylor Lake.

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
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Post Posted: Thu Aug 04, 2005 4:54 pm
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:funny:

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Greg
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Location: Happy Valley
Post Posted: Thu Aug 04, 2005 5:01 pm
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Tales of Happy Valley
Chapter 95: Amazing She



Truly Amazing

Monica looked wistfully at She. "Wow! The last I remember of You, You were that precocious little girl down on south Cherry Street. And now look at You! You've grown to be a truly amazing woman!"

For a brief moment, She appeared less confident, perhaps even guilty. It was a look that only two other people had ever seen in Her. "How little you know Me, Monica," She said. "I'm basically an arrogant, scheming, manipulative, greedy bitch!"

"I'm sorry, my dear," Greg said, "all the rest of that might be subject to some debate and interpretation, but you're a total failure in the bitch department. You don't even do PMS well."

She quickly snapped out of her gloom and grinned, lowering her face just enough to gaze at him through her eyelashes. "Oh yeah? What would you know about PMS? You knocked Me up on our wedding night and perpetually pregnant Me hasn't had a chance to have a period since! I just might be a real terror if I ever had one!"

"Sweetheart, I've known You since You were a teenager! You weren't any good at PMS then, so unless things have changed--"

"Mmmm, yeah! I remember My teenage birthday..."


It started the night She became a teenager

"... you were staying at our house to help with Winona's kids, and after everybody was asleep, I sneaked into your bed!"

"And I ravished the poor, helpless teen! Shame on me!"

"Ha! You never had a chance, buddy! Ravishment commenced before you even knew what was happening!"

Monica laughed. "Oh, this is getting good! I must have missed a lot by time-warping through Your entire teenhood!"

"Oh, it was good, Monica!"

"Still is!" Greg said.

"So then I jumped his bones every night since! I wish you had been there! There are some things I couldn't talk to My mom about, and I certainly couldn't talk to Aunt Winona about My campaign to steal her boyfriend!"

"Golly! Was it every night?" Greg asked.

"Well, almost every night!" She said. "There was that night I had to work late on my cop job, so I sent in Joanne to keep you tuned up!"


She recruited Joanne Allardice as a surrogate

She gazed at the wall for a brief moment. "That turned out to be a mistake!"

"Aha! I knew there had to be a jealous bone somewhere in that beautiful bod!"

"Jealous, schmealous!" She said. "The problem was that you were all worn out and I was so horny when I got home I was ready to jump her bones!"

Greg grinned at Her. "Oh? Did you?"

"Nope. She was so exhausted by the time I got home and woke her up that she just wanted to go home. But I would have!"

Monica was beside herself with giggles now. "Oho! So you might not be much of a bitch, but you're a bitch in heat!"

"OK, I'll grant you that one," Greg said. "But arrogant? You have fewer arrogant bones than jealous bones!"

"Well, people treat Me like I'm some kind of goddess. They even capitalize personal pronouns when they talk about Me! See? Even I do it!"

"It's a well-deserved sign of respect, m'dear. It would only be arrogance if You insisted on it, which You don't."

"No, but I like it."

"So? You're appreciative, not arrogant. Oh, Monica, put that down. You two go ahead and talk. I'll tidy up the table and make some coffee."

"Thank you, sweetie."

"See? You're appreciative!"

"And what about greedy?" Monica asked. "You were always a very generous child."

"Oh, not about money," She said. "I could care less about money and things. Besides, we're dripping in so much dough that I can afford to be generous."

"Not all wealthy people feel that way."



"I am greedy about some things!"

"Point taken, but I am greedy about some things! There's one thing I want all I can get of, and I won't share that toy!"

"Told You You were jealous!"

"I just don't want anybody else to use it up! When I want it, I want it!"

"Oh?" said Monica. "So if there's some time when You don't particularly want it, maybe You'd let me borrow--"

"Nope!" She said. "Well, tell you what. If you decide you want to have another baby, we'll talk."

Greg choked on his coffee.

"Well hey! That's another thing I'm greedy about! Babies! I want lots more than I can have! Nature isn't fair!"

While mopping off the front of his shirt, Greg said, "Right. I'll definitely give you that one. When it comes to babies, and certain other things, You're the greediest person I know."

"And manipulative! I'm definitely manipulative!"

"How so?" Monica asked.

"Isn't it obvious? Just a few minutes ago, I manipulated you into giving Me your baby!"

"Nope, I'm not buyin' it, sweetheart," Greg said. "You provide opportunities for people to do what they want. You don't even try to manipulate them into accepting those opportunities. They always do, but that's because You're so good at understanding what people want. Besides, You worry about what they want; not what You want. Big difference. Nope! Not manipulative."

"It sounds like scheming still applies," Monica suggested.

"Can't argue with that one," Greg said. "She is great at coming up with the most outlandish schemes!"

"Well, if greedy and scheming and loving babies are the worst You can do, I'll go back to my original thesis!" Monica said. "She, You are truly amazing!"


Last edited by Greg on Wed Nov 23, 2005 5:38 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Greg
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Location: Happy Valley
Post Posted: Thu Aug 04, 2005 5:46 pm
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Tales of Happy Valley
Chapter 96: Debriefing


Sunset was just beginning to bathe Happy Valley with its crimson glow when She said, "Oh! Look at the time! The babysitter will soon be wondering where we are!"

Greg took the hint. "Yeah, we'd better be on our way. Monica, it was fantastic to see you again!"



Clinching the deal with the clinch

"OK! You too have a safe trip home!" Monica said. "Oh She! The world would be a sorrier place without You!"

"Stop! You'll embarrass Me!" She said. "Keep us up to date on your baby, Monica. If you still want us to when the child is born, we'll provide a good home!"

"Oh, I will! Don't be worrying about me changing my mind. This time, my child will be growing up in his father's home! But can I visit?"

"You darn well better!" She said. "Every day! Or I'll come and get you!"

"I'll be there! Every day! After work."

"Right!"

And so, the Bennetts bid adieu to Monica Backlace and set out to hoof it home.



"I think that went well."


"Well, I'd say that went pretty well!" She said.

"It sure seems like it! Monica's not unhappy any more. You'll have another baby to bring up. And once again, You cleaned up one of my messes!"

"Hey! I like cleaning up your messes! Especially when it comes to babies!"

"You really are an amazing woman, She!"

"Oh, stop! Hmm... on second thought, don't stop! I like it!"

"I do have one question for my truly amazing, wonderful, beautiful, incredible wife," he said. "Why did we leave so early? The babysitter won't be expecting us for at least another hour."

"Because, as soon as Monica brought up the night you got her pregnant, you've been reminiscing in your mind, and your mental guard is down! You're leaking like crazy! Her daughter, too? What a pair!"

"Aw darn! I'm sorry. I'll try to control that. I didn't mean to upset You!"

"You misunderstood me again," She said. "All that reminiscing has got me randy as a mare in May! I had to get you out of there before I had you right there on Monica's living room floor!"

"Oh my! Let's hurry home, then!"

"Nuh uh! Home is too far! There's the park. The park has bushes! I want it now!"

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Zenmistress
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Post Posted: Tue Aug 09, 2005 11:54 am
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Golly...them's some horny simmies ya gots there!! :surprised4:

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Greg
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Location: Happy Valley
Post Posted: Tue Aug 09, 2005 12:10 pm
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Indeed! Now, the hidden mystery is how they got to be that way! lol

Hint: The story is internally consistent, and I've alluded to it many times.

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Greg
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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Liss
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Post Posted: Tue Aug 09, 2005 3:08 pm
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Must be the water? :p

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Greg
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Joined: 30 Aug 2004
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Location: Happy Valley
Post Posted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 1:29 am
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Tales of Happy Valley
Chapter 97: Great Expectations


Maybe there is something in the water, because Happy Valley certainly seems to be undergoing an epidemic of a sort!



The First Trimesterly Happy Valley Preggo Party!

When, during a town census, they discovered that there were twenty pregnant women in town, there was no question what to do about it. This called for a party!

They held the gathering on GD 117 at Amelia Pardihardi Eausiedi's Party Palace. They chose Amelia's place because the facility has lots of space, lots of comfortable seating, the best stereo system in town, and--most significantly--not less than 23 bathrooms!

The party was a smashing success! All of the pregnant moms in town got to be friends and had a great time. The crowning moment was when June Wiley, in the light blue jacket, popped into her second trimester right in the middle of the party!


Rock 'Til You Drop, Mom!
Amelia is the one in green.

According to the guest book, the party was attended by Jenny Lawson, Giselle Testbed, Samantha Wiley, June Wiley, Beryl Bennett, Sheba Bennett, Leona Schuyler, Kimberley Wilburn, Monica Backlace, Baby Crawford, Frieda Bennett, Valerie Matson, Amber Baybrace, Connie Baybrace, Edna Baybrace, Amelia Eausiedi, Ophelia Franks, Donna Franks, Lorna Franks, and Yeeta Spicer.

Even after the party broke up, the parade of expectant moms streaming down the sidewalks of Happy Valley was an awesome sight!


Waddling Home



The following week, the ladies formed the Happy Valley chapter of La Leche League. We are happy to report that the town's one obstetrician is expected to soon achieve a full recovery.


Last edited by Greg on Mon Dec 05, 2005 10:27 pm; edited 4 times in total

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Post Posted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 1:35 am
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The Milk League?

Wait, I get it now.
Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Liss
Daughter of the Moon
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Location: Pocatello, Idaho
Post Posted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 2:21 am
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It's an actual organization. It promotes breastfeeding, the healthiest food for your baby Grin

Wow Greg, you are a glutton for punishment LOL!!!!!!!!! Just imagine having the twins hack in place with almost that many pregnancies and you will be living my Alpha Plain nightmare.

Ummm...I hope Gregsim isn't the father of all of them.

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
Greg
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Location: Happy Valley
Post Posted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 8:23 am
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Liss wrote:
It's an actual organization. It promotes breastfeeding, the healthiest food for your baby Grin

Wow Greg, you are a glutton for punishment LOL!!!!!!!!! Just imagine having the twins hack in place with almost that many pregnancies and you will be living my Alpha Plain nightmare.


Yup. I was acutely aware of La Leche League when my son was an infant. Had anything happened to his mother, they would have been my first call.


Liss wrote:
Ummm...I hope Gregsim isn't the father of all of them.


lol Fortunately, most of these moms can attribute their current state to their own husbands!

Unfortunately, during the Happy Valley census I did discover more baby bombs ticking away.

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Re::story: Tales of Happy Valley
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Post Posted: Wed Aug 10, 2005 6:09 pm
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I KNEW IT!

ROFLMAO

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:story: Tales of Happy Valley
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